If one day…

If one day, I didn’t have to pray for 5 minutes straight in the line at the grocery store, that my total doesn’t go over a certain amount…

If one day, I didn’t well up when I left the grocery store, hoping that I could allow for that food this month, or if I should have gotten less, more bare minimum…

If one day, cringing when the tank is on E, knowing ‘there goes $28 more’ (yes, I’m blessed to have a small tank, for it means a smaller amount at fill up!)…

I’d like to say “one day it won’t be like this”, but I have to be honest…I’m not sure if that’s a promise God’s making to me. Some people suffer with certain thorns their entire lives, not finding relief from their distress – but instead given the strength to endure it, and the grace sufficient for it by His supply. I do not presume to speak for God. I wait, listen, and hope I’m inclining my ear towards the right source. He may give me a way out from under this (1 Cor 10:13), even though it’s not a temptation – I believe that applies to storms in seasons of life. I may not become anxious in a grocery store line one day. That would be glorious. But if and until that changes, I will beg and plead for His strength to pour over me, as oil anoints, so that I may see His character in it and through it. That I may feel His presence and sense His love surrounding it.

That is what I need the most. That is what I hope to be wrapped up in. That will be the living water, which causes me to never thirst again. May my bucket me overflowing.

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