I took this picture in Rockport, MA. One of my blessed mornings, roaming with my dear friend Kristie, taking pictures, soaking up the beauty, and enjoying the company of a friend.
This picture is not mere nostalgia, though I remain grateful for its ties to a wonderful day spent. Today, I see this photograph, and I see a fully bloomed, vibrant flower. I see sharp progress, brilliantly clothed, healthy, open.
I see this…and I am convicted.
I am a withering remnant of the blossom I’m meant to be.
I am weary, lacking, weakened – by my own undoing.
How can I expect growth when I turn away from my Source of life?
A flower will not open without food and light. It is created to sustain purely by these necessitates. It is not complicated. So it is not surprising to know that you will never find a living plant or flower that is not bending, stretching, twisting itself into the sunlight – knowing it needs the warmth in order to be.
is the action of bending toward the light. The direction of growth is dependent on the light source. Hear that? The growth is in response
to the light. Wherever the source, the living being (plants, in relation to phototropic behavior) will bend, groove, adjust itself every which way to ensure it is getting the most life – the most nourishment from its beam.
See basil bend a beautiful dance here
It’s stunning when you truly meditate on the meaning of what nature instinctively does.
I believe that is MY responsibility, my act of PURE worship as well. I am now convicted and convinced that this dance is what I was created to do – in order to be sustained. In order to be alive.
And I can drop to my knees and cry out my sin that I have NOT been doing this. I have gone against what I am built for. I have taken the darkness as tolerable, not seeking to change perspective. I’m settling. I’m settling for so much less than my bones and breath were fashioned for.
I’ve resolved myself to this laborious wandering. I know I lack. I feel it with every echo of my ache. Yet I’m not bending towards my Life. I’m cowering. And I have no excuse as to why. Because I know there is no reason that explains the action. Bottom line, I’ve found myself in a sin, I’ve done the abandoning. And I’m not only hurting myself here. I’m hurting my King. My Jehovah-Jireh who has remained. Who continually provides a way out of my dungeon, even though I scramble back in repeatedly. I’m ignoring Him. He still stands waiting. Looking to the horizon for His daughter to return.
No, I may not have gone off a tangible deep end with obvious acts of rebellion – but so what? That is no better than plainly neglecting His wisdom, His Word, His love that stands ever-ready. If I treated a human like this – ignoring, avoiding, scheduling meaningless tasks or whining excuses instead of making time to sit, to be, to communicate and invest – oh I wouldn’t be a worthy friend at all.
He stays. He waits.
He is patient. He is kind. He keeps no record of wrongs.
He – my Yahweh – is LOVE.
And He is the Light I will stop neglecting.
May I never, ever cease stretching to reach His warmth.