It will be difficult to describe though I know that anyone who can relate will understand without words having to be spoken.
When you have a passion that is shared with a defining part of the world, it can be arduous to feel as if your presence can compete with the beauty already adorning the subset of creativity.
Whether you’re a dancer a musician an artist a writer an athlete an actor
you understand that while you have a drive whirling inside of you
to create, to express, to immerse yourself into that which you cannot imagine life without
– knowing how numerous are the fellow members of your dream –
how they bring glory and beauty in their bones
…do you ever find it hard to breathe among them?
Knowing how striking others can be – does it not paralyze you sometimes? Because how can you measure against the wonderful which already exists? Against the masses already successful in their field?
Colors of humanity are so rich, so vibrant. Choices of experts in one’s craft are countless.
This is how it can be for me quite often.
Voices rise against the rushing waters by way of words and prose that reach so deeply – voices of so many I admire who are doing this now. Living their dream well. Being brave and being obedient…
There is so much I can learn. I haven’t quite learned how to accomplish the courage of continuing to do. To create. To endlessly pour out.
I did do that well, once upon a time. It remained with me, I didn’t release everything I made, but I have books filled with sentences that taught me so much, by being released. It is how I learn of me, of Him. Writing it out. It is how I encourage others – written words, records of thanksgiving and exhortation. It has all decreased though … so steadily.
Saying it aloud is one step. These words will not end in
the resolution of fixing what is needed.
But it is a beginning.
To be true.
To list what is wrong so I can work towards figuring out how to improve.
To knead the knots into smooth.
And to the colors of creativity: please keep shining. Keep doing it well because you give me inspiration. You give me beauty to aspire to. Yes, you intimidate me into submission so very often. But I know your heart is to elevate me, not quiet. Your reasons are the same as mine – to give light into darkness. To give voice to the silent and truth to the lies. To embolden the fearful and call out the liars. To bring beauty to the forefront.
One humble, shaking soul thanks you. She is working to join the ranks of you. For no other reason than any other soul with a force that cannot be contained – simply because to create, to put forth the efforts of our passion, is not a choice. It’s a must. It’s air and water and survival.
*Personal Photos, taken in Rockport, MA