I’m oscillating between strength and weakness. Between functioning and being back to “normal” but then mourning and being angry that instead of packing my hospital bag and putting the finishing touches on our nursery in these last few weeks, I’m not. There is no stocking up on supplies. There is no prepping and planning.

The moments that change us have a way of dividing our lives into a before and an after.

I think that happens multiple times in a life. As sad as that is to think about, knowing that we have experiences that we go through, that as monumental as they seem at the time, that there is no guarantee that something even more altering won’t come somewhere else down the line. That’s the side effect of living – leaving ourselves open to knowing that one day it may take every effort we have, just to breathe in and out.

Seven Months. That’s how long it’s been since I came to this space to speak. I’ve gone longer, but it still dampens my spirit, the hiatus between the coming. My sister-sage-writing hero- friend Kris Camealy declared the most perfect insight on the… Read More

I’ve never done the “word of the year” practice. 

With the word of the year, I respect it and have always thought it was a nice idea. I completely understand why it is done. Not only is it motivating, it provides one a grounding to see the whole picture in times of plenty and want, in times of quiet and times of turmoil…

I wasn’t even sure until this morning that I was going to give it a try.

I have a tendency to make more of things than they may be. [If you listen close, you can hear the sound of a collective sarcastic gasp from anyone that knows me at all…]

Still, when it comes to matters of the heart, of emotion – feeling tends to be stronger than practicality. Particularly when it relates to rejection…

I’m constantly in a state of wanting to improve. Not that I’m never good enough (though, okay, yes I’ve felt that plenty of times), but usually in a way that a student wants to learn more from a teacher. From someone who has knowledge and experience and passion for the subject. In a facet of life where I could certainly use the lessons.

I think one of the greatest gifts we can give to each other (other than compassion – which will always be #1 in my opinion) is the opportunity to rest.

I find myself weary faster if I do not have time away and alone to take a deep breath in and a slow, measured breath out. 

I find that change           beautiful.

I’ve grown deep into introvert roots. I cultivate a healthy balance now.

Have you ever prepared for a move or begun Spring Cleaning and come across something you’d almost forgotten existed? You brush off the dust and for a split second may even forget how to use it — like an old instrument (I’m looking at you, Elementary School recorder).
That kind of feeling is what I’m experiencing.

I know. It’s been….a long while. I’m honestly going to be incredibly surprised if there is even a “you” reading this. I may have lost the small pairs of eyes I did have, due to this belabored absence. So much has occurred…. Read More